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Saturday, 14 August 2010


FTX is very near...

I'm guessing this FTX is going to be another tough journey for me to take. I still have to worry about so many things.

What if the signal set doesn't work?
What if the G-10 parameters are not loaded?
What if I forget how to install the BMS?
What if a fall sick and drop during the exercise?
What if...?
What if...?
What if...?

I know I'm not the only one who feels this way, but I just can't but feel like people only need me because they need me... I know I survived a number of outfields alone, but how much longer can I last? I feel like I'm running on fuse, but there is no sense that I could just drop anytime?

If I skip this FTX, people would think I'm lazy.
If I ask for help, nobody would want to help, or they just think I'm stupid.
If I muck this up, I'm pretty screwed.

I really want to take a break, but how?

Please, God above, help me...

:)

None of which matters to us <3.
Saturday, August 14, 2010